Make the Bad Man Stop Rhyming

A month or so ago, BG started wanting to rhyme words. I'm not entirely sure where the desire came from, but I'd like to have a sit down with who or whatever planted the idea. And when we sit down, I have a bill for half of my recent therapy session BECAUSE IT'S DRIVING ME LOONEY! Here's how the conversation goes:

BG: Mom! TREE and TURTLE....rhyyyyyme!

Pause - The emphasis and pauses are important. Don't read it wrong or you won't get the full effect. And by effect, I mean headache.

Me: No, tree and turtle begin with the same letter. Rhyming words END with the same sound. Tree and SEE rhyme!

BG: Mom! Tree.....and seeK...rhyyyyme!

Me: That's closer, but the ending sound isn't quite the same. Great try!

BG: Mom!

Pause - Always with the "MOM!" 1) I'm right here. Haven't moved. No need to shout. 2) Still my name. We don't have to introduce ourselves each time. 3) I'M THE ONLY ONE IN THE CAR!

BG: Mom! Tree and tree....rhyyyyyme!

Me: That's the same sound, very good. But it's same word. Let's play a different game. How about "I Spy?"

Pause - I Spy is one of my least favorite things in the world, but you have to pick your battles. Right now, I pick anything but rhyming.

BG: Mom! BUMP...and BOP...rhyyyyme!

Me: Another great try! Let's sing a song!

BG: Great idea! You are my sunshine, my only sunshine... Mom! Sunshine and....Lunshine....rhyyyyme!

Pause - This is the point at which David suggests I stop responding, correcting or acknowledging. He, however, is not named "Mom" and doesn't know that the sound of "Mom, Mom, Mom, Mom, Mom..." can not only go on for hours but is the #1 cause of drinking in this country. (Ok, maybe not, but it COULD be!)

ME: (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10...)

BG: Mom! Mom! Mama! Mama...

Me: Brynna...

BG: Mom! Sunshine and....Lunshine....rhyyyyme!

Me: Baby, Lunshine is not a word.

BG: Mom! Baby...and BARbies...rhyyyyme!

Close enough...


PS - I must acknowledge that she's almost mastered it at this point. I have no hair left and a twitch in my left eye, but by golly WE CAN RHYME!