Jun 17, 2013

Ok to Cry

I remember being in my pajamas. I remember laying on the floor next to my brother watching the Sunday night movie. (Remember those?) I remember not really understanding why I was crying even as I did so. As Pollyana fell from the tree and her spirit was broken, the movie paused for commercial. (Kids, that's a thing that used to happen throughout a program and you had to...brace yourselves...WAIT for the show to resume.) I remember my brother asking what was wrong, trying to figure out what alien life force had overtaken me. I remember sitting on my mom's lap - not something I did often. We talked about what happened in the movie and that it's ok to cry.

Fast forward 25 years...
I can't take much more animated television and it's hard to find a show these days that doesn't have inappropriate content. That's why Brynna and I have been watching Full House recently. Tonight after dinner, she went up and got ready for bed. She brushed her teeth and put on her pajamas, then she snuggled in next to me and we watched as Uncle Jesse prepared to leave the "full house" to live with his new wife. He sat 4 year old Michelle down and explained that he would still be near, and as the show went to commercial, Michelle and Uncle Jesse each had a tear in their eyes. I looked down to realize that my 4 year old had a tear, too. She sat on my lap and told me that when I went away this weekend, it made her sad like the little girl on television.

I'm sure she won't remember all the details. I'm sure she won't really understand or realize why she was crying. But as I held my little girl tonight and remembered being a little girl myself, I said a prayer for her. I prayed that God would protect her innocence, and I hoped that 25 years from now what she does remember is that her mama held her and assured her that its ok to cry.

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